The truth.

[kenjie]

While this isn’t something that I would like to admit, I feel like it’s time to tell the truth on a certain situation surrounding my life. Today, I cried for the first time in years. I know people use it as a coping mechanism to get over things but that isn’t the case for me. Crying ultimately makes me feel worse for the simple fact that it is my body’s way of admitting defeat. It’s a little silly but it’s the truth at the same time. The truth that I have to own up to is the fact that my relationship ended two months ago today. For the past two months, I have been blatantly telling lies to make it seem like everything is alright when it isn’t. I’m usually good with these things but I finally hit my limit and I was forced to break down and just let it out. I feel terrible for basically telling lies to everyone for over the past two months but I feel like it was necessary to deal with my problem on my own time.  While I’m not a fan of feeling like this, I realize that it will help me to get over certain things that I have been feeling. Yes, I do feel rotten right now but it feels good to finally let this out. Of course, whenever people ask, “How are things going with Sarah?” I’ll figure out a way to explain to them because I don’t think I’ll be able to continue pretending because that won’t help anything. It feels good to finally get this out.

Instead of writing a million paragraphs, I’ll end this now by saying that today begins a new chapter and I can actually start to feel better now that things are out in the open.